I was twenty-one when I first moved away from home for a semester of college. It might seem late to some but for a young girl with no direction in life, depressed and suffering with anxiety and undiagnosed PTSD from childhood sexual abuse she had yet to disclose to anyone, this was a huge deal. … More “Get out of the van, Mia; Keep going.” – A 24 mile life lesson about not giving up.
Three years ago I was in so much pain that leaving this world, ending my life, was the only way I believed the pain would all end. Last night I started writing a post about what got me to that point and I couldn’t complete it, I became too emotional. I will complete that post … More Tell someone you are happy they are ALIVE today
There is a disturbing trend going around. It’s out of control. I dare say, it is possibly the most threatening event of the first few days of 2016. That’s right, folks … I am talking about the use of “spirit animal” getting out of hand. I have recently heard on a TV program and … More Struggle with Joy
I grieve dreams. I grieve hope. I grieve for innocence and isolation. All that I grieve came rushing back to me recently. I was at my parent’s home and my mother wanted some help going through old pictures. It started out just great, I loved seeing myself as a baby, a toddler, a feisty little … More What do you grieve?
I hate the words “mental illness”. They somehow say to me that my brain is sick, my brain is less than your brain, and as such isn’t good enough – is defective. Others might feel differently but this is me – I am not a label and I am not ill. I believe my … More Um … Should you call me fragile?
There is nothing that I love to hate more than positive affirmations; well, that and mirror selfies … my only problem with that being that in this scenario I couldn’t get a picture of my hated positive affirmations that were taped to a mirror without falling victim to the dreaded mirror selfie. So, I … More I LOVE negative affirmations like, “I HATE positive affirmations.”
Depression. What do you think when you read the word? Here are some of the guesses I have of what could have crossed your mind: sad, over used, weak, hard, real, pathetic, alone, get over it, all in your head, black hole hopeless, etc. ; or possibly it was a person that came to … More Depressed people are allowed into Amusement Parks too.
I love language. I love the power that can come in the right word, the right phrase; how one can be reading or listening to music, or even talking with a friend and the right words come together in a way that one is caught off guard and pleasantly surprised. For me, it often feels … More Trauma. Loss. Courage. Compassion.
For as long as I can remember, my dad and I have had a game that we play while driving. It normally begins when the weather starts to change, when it gets cooler. It’s been a long time since I have played it, but every now and then I’ll catch myself thinking about it and … More Holding on. Letting go.
It happened again yesterday. This overwhelming sense of shame that started in my stomach and seemed to extend itself until it encompassed me whole. Even my fingertips could feel the hot, white, burning shame. It was so real and evident to me that even though I was in mid conversation with someone I had zero … More The white, hot, shame of being SINGLE